


The Sea I've Been Longing For: A Collection of AoT Stories

by Rutsu_the_Zangoose



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Cheesy, F/M, One day I'll add tags, Smut, will update as I go
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-06
Updated: 2019-03-30
Packaged: 2019-10-23 06:54:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,747
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17678582
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rutsu_the_Zangoose/pseuds/Rutsu_the_Zangoose
Summary: Various AoT/SnK reader insert oneshots! MAY CONTAIN MANGA SPOILERS! and sometimes smutt ;)Currently there's only Eren x Reader, but I hope to add other characters :)Update: Currently on Hiatus





	1. The Sea I've Been Longing For (Eren x Reader)

**Author's Note:**

> THIS CONTAINS MANGA SPOILERS! READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!
> 
>  
> 
> I wrote this because I'm rather conflicted about the situations in the current chapters. I love my angry boi but he's been a dick! This is me hoping he has justifiable reasons for his actions lol Constructive criticism is welcomed, but please be gentle. I haven't written a fanfic in ages ^^;
> 
> Of course, I don't own any of the AoT/SnK characters or material ^.^

I did everything for him. I joined the military for him, I chose the Survey Corps for him, I took the titan serum and consumed an opposing titan shifter all for him.

We grew up together, he and I, along with Mikasa and Armin. We witnessed the horrors of the titans together, we ventured beyond the walls together, we ended the war against the titans together and then started the war against the world together. He started acting on his own around that time. He started putting more faith in his half brother than in me, and for what reason? Why? I couldn’t understand. 

Rather, I didn’t want to understand.

The sun was setting, painting the dusky blue sky with vivid oranges and pinks. A sigh escaped my lips. It was so bright, so colorful, so…

“Beautiful, right?” The voice was husky. I quickly inhaled and momentarily held my breath, not bothering to turn towards the source. He walked towards me, the Earth crunching beneath him, stopping only once he stood right next to me. I didn’t look at him, and he didn’t look at me. We both stared into the horizon while he continued to speak, “The sunset, the sunrise, the ocean, the mountains, they are all so beautiful, but nothing can compare to the sea that I always find myself lost in.”

I chuckled, “That’s very poetic of you.” I didn’t dare look at him though, for I understood him completely. Nothing could compare to the sea that I always found myself lost in when I looked into those eyes of his. I could only imagine how they would look with the light of the setting sun reflecting off of them. I wouldn’t be able to keep my composure if I were to witness that, and I think he knew that for he had turned away from the sunset and stared at me.

“Look at me,” he whispered as he placed a hand on my cheek and forced me to turn towards him. “Ah, there’s that sea I’ve been longing for.” He stared into my eyes and I watched as his forlorn expression turned into a smile that reached his own eyes. His deep teal eyes shined in the diminishing light, and they were so alluring that I thought I was going to lose myself in them. A blurry film was forming over my vision, and I could feel tears cascading down my cheeks. He put his other hand on my cheek and caressed my skin with his thumbs, whipping away the tears and whispering, “It’s been so long, please don’t cry.”

“Why,” my voice cracked, I knew looking at him would break me, “Why are you doing this?”

“So that we can be free-”

“Don’t give me that, Eren!” I tried to yell, but I was sure it sounded more like a gasping wail. “Becoming a scapegoat, taking on all of the hate, all of the burden, everything by yourself so that we can all be free, there has to be another way!” My hands balled up in the fists and I angeled my head downward with my eyes shut tight. I couldn't bare to look at him anymore, I couldn't risk losing myself in those eyes.

He cupped my chin with his right hand, and bought my head up. I cracked my eyes open to see him leaning forward with lidded eyes. When his lips reached mine, we both closed our eyes and melted into the kiss. It was slow, as if he were pouring his entire being into this simple action. His lips were chapped, but I was sure mine were too. I lifted my arms and placed my hands on his chest, which I realized was bare. I missed this, I missed him, but I simultaneously hated this and hated him. Selfishly taking on the world on his own. Why? We made a promise to always be there for each other, and he was breaking it.

He broke the kiss too soon, yet not soon enough. I took in his features. His chocolate colored hair had grown quite long and it was tied back, revealing his handsome face and those damned eyes I refused to look into. His torso was chiseled and his pants clung to his hips, he didn’t deserve to look this good.

“This is the only way for you to be free,” he spoke up, breaking the silence. 

My eyes widened and I jerked my head up to face him, to look him in the eye. “I don’t want to be free if this is the price that must be paid! My freedom means nothing if it is without you!” My voice was laced with desperation, I hated it. I was so weak, why was I so weak?

He looked hurt as he sighed, “I know, but it isn’t your decision to make, it’s mine, and your freedom means everything to me. I refuse to let you live in a world of constant fear.”

“I can help, though! I became a titan shifter so that I could help you, but you keep pushing me away! Why-”

“I can’t risk losing you! No matter how strong you’ve become!” He sounded broken, and he looked away. “I love you too much,” he whispered. My body felt heavy as I stepped towards him and wrapped my arms around his neck, burying my face against his chest. He nuzzled the top of my head while wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling me closer. “Please,” his voice cracked, “Can I spend this night with you?”

I nodded, “I’ve waited so long for you to return, for you to come back from the mainland, for you to come back to me. I love you, Eren.”


	2. The Sea I've Been Longing For P2 Reader POV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A continuation of The Sea I've Been Longing For in the Reader's point of view.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It still contains manga spoilers, you've been warned. There's also some poorly written smutt.
> 
> I was requested to do a continuation and this is what I produced! I thought about writing this in Eren's POV as well, but it might have to wait until after I finish an Eren x Childhood Friend Reader request. I have a bad habit of writing these late at night when I can't sleep, so I hope it didn't turn out too bad! I haven't written smut in like...6 years you guys... Constructive criticism welcomed, but please be gentle!!!
> 
> As always, I don't own any of the AoT/SnK characters or material ^.^

_Eren loved taking things slow, relishing in the moment as if it were the last time. I loved that about him, but I also hated it. I wanted him to promise to return to me, but that was a promise he refused to make. He didn’t want to make a promise he couldn’t keep, but I wanted him to make a promise that would give me something to hold on to, a promise that would keep me going._

_He leaned into the crook of my neck and peppered it with kisses. One of his hands softly skimmed up my back and over my neck, stopping once he reached the back of my head and he tangled his fingers within my hair. He placed light kisses up my neck and jaw, and then nibbled on my ear before pressing his lips into it and huskily whispering, “I want to remember this night until the day I die. I want to remember how your eyes shine with the sunset, I want to remember how your smile glows under the moonlight, and I want to remember how soft your body feels against mine.”_

I woke up with a start, throwing the blanket off my bed. My eyes were wide and my breathing was uneven. I was dreaming about that night again, that awfully wonderful night. I settled a bit upon realizing, and tears welled up in my eyes. It had been nearly a month and yet I still dreamed of that night and it made me wonder if he did too. I woke up to find him gone, probably searching for his half brother, no doubt. I wanted nothing more than to journey to Zeke’s location, but I was given orders to go to Historia and I refused to abandon that mission, I refused to abandon her.

The door to my room was pushed open, revealing the majesty herself. “Is everything okay?”

“Yes, of course, m’lady,” I quickly wiped my face with a sleeve and pushed myself out of bed. “It’s that pesky dream haunting me again, I hope I didn’t wake you,” I gave her my best smile in hopes that she would overlook my disheveled state. She looked crestfallen though, obviously recognizing my smile as forced and fake. I sighed, “Let me freshen up and then I’ll be right out to make us some breakfast.” I was assigned to be Historia’s bodyguard and caretaker through the final months of her pregnancy, but sometimes I wondered if I was the correct choice for this task as my emotional distress clearly had a negative impact on her. I grabbed my uniform and walked to the bathroom while holding my head. The dreams that plagued me every night had been accompanied with headaches every morning for the past few days. It was a pain but I wouldn’t allow it to be a hindrance, I already worried Historia enough as it were.

After washing and changing, I walked into the kitchen to see Historia patiently waiting at the table. I gave her a genuine smile this time and asked, “How does eggs and potatoes with toast sound?”

She nodded, “That sounds wonderful,” and flashed me a smile in return. Good, I was worried that the consistency of my startling mornings would wear her down. I quickly prepared breakfast and set a plateful of food down in front of her before taking my seat across from her and digging into my food.

“Are you okay, m’lady? You’re abnormally quiet this morning.”

“How many time do I have to tell you to call me by my name? We trained together and fought alongside each other in the Survey Corps, there’s no need for titles between us.” Historia picked at her food some before continuing, “That aside, are you sure you’re okay? You’ve become more sluggish in the mornings, and you’re shoveling your food as if this is your last meal.”

I paused, I hadn’t noticed how quickly I had been eating as of late. “Oh, sorry about that. I guess the dreams are starting to weigh on me. I tend to wake up with headaches and stomach pains now, but please, don’t let that bother you.”

She stared at me for a moment before questioning me again, “If you don’t mind me asking, when was the last time you bled?”

I nearly choked on the food I was in the midst of swallowing. I coughed, “I’m due to start soon.”

“Ah, that explains it,” she replied, content with my response. She continued eating her food while I was stared at what remained on my plate, knowing full well what she was insinuating with those questions. I shook my head and finished what was left on my plate while my mind wandered.

_Eren slowly unbuttoned my shirt while softly kissing me. My shirt fell off my shoulders and I dropped my arms, letting it fall to the ground before wrapping my arms around his neck again. I then untied his hair, letting the long, chocolate locks down. He wrapped his arms around my back and pulled me towards him, pressing my bare torso against his, and then dragged his tongue over my lips. I parted my lips for him, and our tongues danced together fervently. I could feel his longing and desperation, and I hoped he could feel my overflowing emotions as well. He broke the kiss, much to our shared reluctance, and pressed his forehead against mine. I opened my eyes to see him staring at me with those deep teal eyes, filled to the brim with adoration. “I love you so much,” he panted._

An arm was flailing in my field of vision, snapping me back to reality. I looked up at Historia, her face painted with concern. I chuckled, “Sorry about that, lost in thought!” I picked up our plates and took them to the sink where I began to wash them. 

Historia watched me like a hawk, her eyes following my every movement. “I don’t mean to pry, but have you seen Eren since his return?” I froze in place, which didn’t go unnoticed. “Are your recurring dreams of him?”

“Nothing gets past you, old friend,” I half-heartedly chuckled, “I saw him the night before I arrived here, and that night replays in my dreams.”

“I see. The same thing happened when he started acting on his own about a year ago and became more distant towards us, his fellow comrades. You would wake up in a cold sweat every morning, and go into a daze whenever you were unoccupied.” I nodded in response, and finished washing the dishes. “You arrived here nearly a month ago,” Historia added. I turned towards Historia and opened my mouth, ready to counter her suggestion, but she cut me off, “I’ll have my nurse look at you. If nothing else, I’m sure she can give you something to help with the heachaches and stomach pains.” Before I could respond, Historia got up and walked outside. I sighed and followed her out. She sat in a rocker on the porch, looking out onto the pasture. I leaned against the doorway, and followed her gaze.

_“I love you too,” I panted in response, “I love you so much.” Eren’s hands skimmed down my sides, stopping at the hem of pants. My hands fell over his chest and abdomen, stopping at his pants and slowly unbuttoning them and pushing them down to the ground. He crashed his lips against mine, hungrily kissing me while hurriedly unbuttoning my pants and pushing them down to the ground, my panties following suit. He then grabbed me by my hips and lifted me, and I wrapped my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck, running my fingers through his hair and deepening the kiss._

I felt a tap on my shoulder and I turned to see an older lady giving me a gentle smile, “Her majesty has requested that I give you a check up and run some tests so, if you would, please follow me.” I simply nodded and followed her back inside.

***

After taking some measurements and blood samples, the nurse urged that I return to Historia’s side and that she would come to me with the results of the tests. When I stepped onto the porch, Historia didn’t even look at me and said, “You must miss him very much.”

“Ah, yes, I’m sorry to have concerned you-”

“Please stop acting like you’re a burden to me! You are my friend, please let me help you!” I looked at her with wide eyes. “I know you’re hurting, you’ve been hurting, talk to me about it, cry on my shoulder, please stop acting like it doesn’t bother you!” 

At first, I was too shocked to respond. Ever since she became pregnant, Historia always looked so drained. It was hard enough to provoke a smile that reached her eyes, let alone any sort of outburst, and yet she was overflowing with emotion before my very eyes. She wanted me to open up to her, but unpacking my thoughts, my emotions, would no doubt cause me to unravel. I dropped to my knees and let my head sink into her lap, tears overflowing and staining her gown. I tried to speak but voice kept breaking and turning into a sob. I wanted to stay by his side, I wanted to shoulder some of the burden, I wanted to be there through it all. I missed him. I missed his disheveled hair, his ocean colored eyes, his overprotectiveness, his passion and drive.

Historia patted my head and stroked my hair, causing my sobbing to cease. I always found the gesture to be soothing, it never failed to calm me. I wondered if she had learned that from Eren. In our time with the Scouts he often held me when situations became overwhelming and stroked my hair. I closed my eyes and focused on the action.

_Eren sat in the grass with me in his lap. He kissed my cheek and then sighed, “It’s been so long, nearly a year.” He caressed my thighs with his thumbs and pressed his forehead against mine, taking in my presence and basking in the moment. “I missed you every second we were apart. I missed your hypnotic eyes, your beautiful smile, your contagious laughter, your stubbornness,” he chuckled at that, “I missed your love, and I missed loving you.”_

“What were the results?” Historia’s voice sounded distant, I must had fallen asleep.

“I’m afraid your intuition was correct, m’lady, she is indeed with a child.” That voice sounded like the older lady, the nurse. Who were they talking about? Who would get pregnant at a time like this? We were in the midst of a revolution and a war against the world, it took everything we had just to survive in our current state of affairs. 

I groggily opened my eyes and looked up at Historia, wincing as the bright light of the sun flooded my vision. I probably looked like a mess with bloodshot eyes after that display. I staggered to my feet and chuckled, “I guess I should go clean up.”

“Wait,” Historia grabbed onto my sleeve and looked into my eyes, distress apparent on her face.

I took her hand in mine and kneeled in front of her, “Did something happen while I was asleep?” My voice was clearly laced with concern.

“Your test results came back... You’re pregnant.” I froze. That conversation was about me?

_Eren lifted me up by my rear and pressed into my core, and then I lowered my body until he was completely sheathed inside me. I gasped and buried my face in the crook of his neck. He lifted a hand to my head and stroked my hair while lightly kissing the top of my head. We stayed like that for a moment or two and then I started to grind my hips, causing him to release a groan. The noises he made caused my face to flush and a warm feeling to spread from my core. I turned away from him, hoping he wouldn’t notice. He cupped my face with his hands and made me look at him, and then leaned forward and planted a loving kiss on my lips. “You look beautiful right now.”_

_He then let his hands fall to my hips and bucked upward. “Eren,” I moaned, which only made him more eager to please. He gripped my hips tightly and continued the hard and fast motion at a rhythmic pace. I wrapped my arms tightly around his neck and followed his pace, forcing him deep inside me. I nuzzled the crook of his neck before biting down and sucking. I needed to mark him, I needed claim him, I needed to remind him. He moaned my name in response, causing the muscles in my core to spasm. I craved that sound, that feeling, so I worked my way up his neck, biting and sucking and leaving bruises._

_He gave a breathless chuckle, “If you keep that up, I’m not going to last long. It’s been too long, I’m out of practice.”_

_I leaned back and smiled at him, “Y-yeah, me too.”_

_He returned the smile, “I’m glad.” He then caressed my face and kissed me roughly. His rhythmic thrusts became more erratic, more desperate, so much so that I couldn’t keep pace. He grabbed my hips and moved them in time with his thrusts, pumping himself inside me. He then wrapped his arms around my shoulders, pulling me close before giving one final thrust, slamming into me and releasing inside me._

_Releasing inside me._

I stood up and looked at Historia with wide eyes and a gaping mouth. I brought my hands up to my mouth. How did I let this happen?

“I know what you’re thinking-”

“Oh, no. No, no, no, this can’t be happening. I can’t bring a child into this world. I can’t even fully raise a child since I became a titan shifter, I won’t live long enough,” I started to panic.

“We can do this together, you just need to calm down-”

I crouched down and started to hyperventilate, “I can’t see Eren again, not after this. There’s too much at stake to have a child involved. This is all my fault. How could I allow this to happen? I… I...” I collapsed and darkness consumed my vision.

_Eren wrapped his arms around my waist and held me close while we looked up at the clear night sky. The stars shone brightly and the moon was full, it was beautiful. “It still doesn’t compare,” he said._

_I giggled, “Stop trying to flatter me, it doesn’t suit you.”_

_“You’re right,” he chuckled, “I sound unbearably cheesy, but I guess that’s what happens after being away from you for so long.” He kissed my cheek and then continued to speak, “I know I’ve been distant, and then I left for the mainland, but I promise I won’t make you wait so long for me again. I have some business to attend to and I don’t want you involved, but I know where you’re headed and I’ll see you again soon.”_

I quickly sat up and a jolt of pain coursed through my head, causing me wince and lift my hand to it. “I can’t stay here, he knows I’m here,” I grunted, the pain in my head not letting up.

“You can’t leave here, I need you here.” I looked up to see Historia sitting at the end of my bed. I looked at her, confused, but before I could question she continued, “I had one of the farm workers carry you here. I couldn’t leave you passed out on the front porch.” I wanted to say something or at least nod in response, but my head was pounding and it hurt to even move. “Lay back down and rest,” Historia commanded and I obliged, there was nothing else I could do in state I was in anyway.

***

Two months passed, and Historia was due any day now. I was starting to show but I was still more than capable and continued to care for her. I found it ironic that I was assigned to help her though, as I felt she was more of a help to me and my mental state than I was to her.

“Would you like some steak?” I was cooking lunch for us, and meat was a luxury that I felt she deserved.

She beamed, “Yes! What for though?”

“Well, our situations haven’t been ideal and you deserve such a delicacy,” I flashed her a smile before turning back to the food. I finished cooking the steak and divided it between our two plates and then added a cooked potato to each plate. A knocking sound resonated from the front door as I picked up the plates and ventured to the table. “I’ll be right there,” I yelled before placing one plate in front of Historia and the other across from her. I walked towards the door and opened it, expecting to see one of the farm workers but instead I saw a pair of brilliant teal eyes and I suddenly found myself slamming the door.

“Is everything okay?” Historia called, probably alarmed at the sound of the door slamming.

“Y-yeah,” I stammered and looked down at the ground. My face was flushed and my breathing was uneven, I needed to calm down but I wasn’t given a chance to as the door creaked open to reveal a shocked and slightly irritated Eren Jaeger.

His hair was tied back and his eyes scanned over my body in silence. He wore a loosely fitting white shirt with a black hoodie and black pants. He stepped through the doorway and I kept the distance between us by backing away. His eyes flickered between my eyes and my swollen belly and then he stared into my eyes, hurt evident within his own. “You waited a year for me before, but now you can’t even wait a few months, huh.”

My eyes widened at his misunderstanding and I choked, “This isn’t what it looks like-”

“Yeah? You look pregnant to me, so who’s is it?” A menacing aura radiated from him while he interrogated, “Why’d you do it?” I took another step back, provoking him to take a step forward. “It’s not like I can do anything about it anyway, not even I would stoop to that level.” My mind was racing, trying to figure out what to tell him. I could go along with the misunderstanding and then he wouldn’t have to accept the child, or I could tell him that the child is his and burden him further. Tears started to uncontrollably cascade down my face, and I brought my hands up to my face in attempt to cover it.

“Eren?” I turned around to see Historia right behind me. She looked at me for a moment and then returned her gaze to Eren and sighed, “I should’ve known you’d show up, I’m due any day now, but I honestly didn’t expect this.”

“You didn’t expect me to find out my lover of over four years got impregnated by some bastard?”

“No, Eren, I didn’t expect you to accuse your lover of getting impregnated by someone else. Didn’t you have sex with her three months ago?”

He paused, slightly taken aback, and then said, “As if I could forget that night, but if it were mine then I’m sure someone would’ve told me.”

“I… I didn’t want you to know,” I spoke up, my voice shaky, failing me when I needed it, “I didn’t want to burden you with a child when you already carry so much on your shoulders as it is.” I tried to wipe the tears away before looking into his eyes. “I would wait for you until the end of days, Eren, I thought you knew that…” My voice wavered, and I could feel tears overflowing again. 

I turned to leave but a pair of strong arms wrapping around my shoulders stopped me. He pulled me close and nuzzled the top of my head. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have assumed. I let my fears get the best of me.” He chuckled, “I guess I’m going to have to work a bit faster so that the kid is born into a world of peace and freedom.”

“Yeah,” I half-heartedly laughed.

A silence lingered between us and then he spoke up. “I love you.” I loved hearing him say that, I couldn’t get enough of it, so I didn’t respond, hoping I could hear those words again. “I love you,” he repeated, his voice heavy with passion, “I love you more than anything.”

I smiled, “I love you too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll have you know that I had to skim recent chapters to make sure I had my timeline right! Hopefully it worked out XD


	3. Incomplete Childhood Friend Eren x Reader

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is how they first met, one day I might actually do something with this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I basically wrote one short story and then abandoned this work, life has gotten busier and I have become obsessed with The Promised Neverland. I was writing a Childhood Friend Eren x Reader and I didn't get very far but I didn't want it to sit in my google docs forever so I decided to put up what I have so far. I might finish it in the future, I just need to settle down first and probably drink a little something (because I doubt I would have put up that first story if I weren't tipsy...)

“Armin, where are you taking me?” I was pouting as my twin brother pulled me by the wrist through the streets of Shiganshina. It wasn’t often that we venturned through these bustling streets, and Armin was acting rather unusual, grinning widely and walking as fast as my legs would allow.

“I want you to meet my new friend! He’s rather brash, but he’s a really good guy!” Armin flashed a toothy smile my way. I was somewhat confused by this. Armin and I were seen as different, probably because we preferred to sit in the grass under a tree with books in hand, so we would typically avoid interacting with people aside from family. The only new people Armin and I normally had close encounters with were those looking to pick a fight. He also described this new friend as brash. My eyes widened as many different scenarios of Armin being threatened played through my mind. However, I wasn’t given the chance to voice my concerns before we reached a set of steps and Armin happily cried out, “Hey Eren! I brought my twin sister with me today!”

I peered from behind my brother to see a little boy, probably the same age as us, at the foot of the steps. His chocolate hair was disheveled but framed his face perfectly, and he had vibrant, teal eyes. He wore a toothy grin and waved at us, beckoning us to join him. Armin jerked me down the steps, causing me to stumble and fall onto my hands and knees at the bottom. “Oof!”

“Ack! I’m sorry, Sis!”

Before Armin could help me up, the little boy, Eren if I remembered correctly, offered his hand to me, a wide smile adorning his face. I took his hand and he pulled me up to my feet. “You must be Armin’s sister! My name’s Eren Jaeger!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have some ideas for BNHA x Reader one shots, and there needs to be more Norman x Emma, so I might do something along those lines for now if I ever make the time to do so.


End file.
